Saturday, May 21, 2011

Settling In

Life is finally settling back into a routine, slowly but surely.  Last week was my first week at the new job without training wheels, ie my predecessor, to make sure I didn't forget anything.  Aside from one or two little mistakes, the week went well.  My parents came back from their vacation and none to soon as Dare Bear came down with a cold and had to stay home from day care on Thursday.  He promptly gave the cold to Tiger Daddy, who then developed a sinus infection.  It was also Dare's second week at the new day care and he's begun to settle in there too.  So I am at little more at peace and life is a little calmer.

We had planned on going camping, for the first time this year, but due to the germ ridden men in the family, we canceled the trip.  While it's disappointing that we have not yet had our first camping trip of the season, it turned out to be a blessing.  We had beautiful weather and the kids got to play out in the backyard with my dad this morning.  Then Nana Bear got to go visit my grandmother, and unexpectedly, got to go to a friend's birthday party, which just happened to be at the playground my dad took her to after the visit.

Meanwhile, I got to get some prepping done for some projects that have been on my to-do list.  I have a baby shower to attend next month, so I worked cutting the fabric as neatly as possible for a blanket.  My mother-in-law's birthday is coming up next weekend and I need to finish her present.  And finally, I have set a goal of June 1 to "open" Etsy shop, so I cut the fabric for my products and all have have to do is sew them together.  Well, that's not all I have to do: I want to make tags for products, brand them, if you will, so I have to come up with a least a start-up logo.  Oh, and must determine prices...  math, bleh.

The baby shower present:



Just my fleece/flannel blanket, but this time I am attempting to personalize the blanket using some of the left over fleece.  

My Etsy project: 



Hopefully these will turn out to be dop kits for the men or make-up bags for women...

So all-in-all, this weekend home, so far, has been very productive and relaxing.  Hopefully tomorrow I'll get to finishing some of my Etsy products.

Happy Crafting!

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The Art of Juggling

The euphoria of the quick crafting at the end of last week has worn off and I find myself in need of another fix, but yet, quite unmotivated to go after it.  In part, I am waiting for some supplies for my Father's Day dop kits.  But mostly, I am just feeling tired and unsure.  Unsure about my ability to craft, unsure about my ability to do my (new) job and unsure about my ability to parent.  As I sit here writing, I feel as if I am madly flailing about trying to keep all the balls in the air.

As mentioned in the last post, I just started a new job and when I left my old job, I only had a week to train someone in my duties.  So that last week of the old job was extremely stressful as I tried to get someone up to speed as well as get as much done as humanly possible.  Then, of course, came the stress of starting the new job and trying to learn every detail in two weeks.

In that last week of work, I also learned that Dare Bear's daycare provider had a medical emergency and would be unable to watch him indefinitely.  So we also had to find a replacement daycare provider (THANK YOU MOM) and then, had to make the decision to find a new daycare provider as well as find said daycare provider.  The hardest part was probably the fact that we felt extremely guilty for leaving our injured daycare provider.  But, while we were fortunate enough to have my mom available to watch Dare, she went on vacation for 10 days this past Sunday and it was a choice of starting a new provider hunt two weeks ago or start it next week.  We chose the former to minimize the stress to all parties, but still there is some guilt about leaving our former daycare provider who watched Dare for the past 2 years.  Thankfully, our first two days with the new daycare provider have been absolutely wonderful - Dare has come home happy, adjusted very, very quickly, and seems to be blossoming before our eyes.  It helps that some of the things we didn't like about the old daycare are not an issue here.  When we pick up Dare, we get to go into the house and see Dare interact with the other kids.  Drop-off and pick-up time is quick, efficient and informative.  So this was all-in-all a very good change, but the ramp up to the change was a little fraught.

The new job is awesome - awesome co-workers, awesome clients, awesome environment.  I couldn't be happier in this position.  I will be mixing my administrative knowledge with client centered care/front line social work, taking what I have been doing and mixing it with what I used to do just after college.  But as I train with my predecessor, my insecurities have blossomed.  I have gone from knowing that I was rocking a job to not knowing whether I will rock this job as well as my predecessor.  Logically, I know I will make this job my own and I know that it's not a competition.  My predecessor is me at my old job.  Whoever takes over will have big shoes to fill.  And after late nights, fitful sleeps, and other confidence issues, there's the little voice of doubt growing larger and larger.

The sphere of parenting...  I fully admit that I should be a better parent.  I need more patience - and sleep would help that immensely - and I need to play more with my kids.  My relationship with Nana Bear can be contentious - I see too much of myself in her and I want her to be better than me.  I want both of them to go farther, travel more, be more than me.  Getting them there - that's the challenge.  Maintaining a sense of calm is a struggle.  I wish I could just let things be...

Finally, my crafting.  I find great joy in crafting for my friends and family.  I find great joy in coming up with my own patterns, no matter how simple they may be, and no matter how unprofessional the results may look.  And I would like nothing more than to put an item for sale on Etsy.  But again, the doubt bubbles to the surface as the opportunity to actually put an item on Etsy presents itself.  The "What ifs" abound in my head making it hard to sleep.  What if it doesn't sell?  What if someone buys it but doesn't think it's well made.  What if, what if, what if...  So on and so forth until the crafting what ifs merge with the parenting what ifs merge with the job what ifs, etc.

I told my cousin recently, there is no greater fear than fear itself, and that is certainly true.  Hopefully when the world settles down again - when I find the rhythm of the new job, when I actually start going to bed on time - I will find the space to silence the fear and to move on with my crafting.  But until then, I need one less ball to juggle and to focus on the things that are truly important - my family and friends and my job (because without that there would be a whole lot more to be stressed about).

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day, friends! I can't believe it's been 3 weeks since I last posted. Life has been very unscripted and I have been unmotivated to craft until a few days ago, when I realized in a panic, that I was ever so unprepared for Mother's day.

Since my last post, Nana Bear recovered from her bout of Strep, Dare Bear developed pneumonia, I had to train my replacement at work in 1 one and I just finished my first week at my new job. Dare Bear's pneumonia was particularly challenging for us as there was a moment of uncertainty about whether he needed to be hospitalized. Luckily, he responded well to antibiotics and was practically his normal self by Easter. So crafting took a back burner to life. Then came Wednesday night when I realized the only gift I had planned on was for my mother-in-law: a version of the make-up bag with a beautiful French themed upholstery fabric. But I had no clue what I was going to do for her mother, Tiger Daddy's paternal grandmother, my mother or my grandmother. By that time I knew we would have very, very little time to shop between Thursday and weekend.

Luckily I had some left over Avery photo fabric (printable fabric) and of course, an ever growing stash of fabric. I envisioned a quilt bookmark with family pictures for the squares.  I perused our library of digital pictures of the Bears and other close family members.  I cropped the pictures and re-sized them to 1.5 inch squares. I made 4 sets of 3.  In Adobe Photoshop, I arranged the squares on a 8.5 in x 11 in canvas (the size of the photo fabric).

I had intended to sew the photo fabric to the border fabric, but when arranging in Photoshop, I forgot to leave a quarter inch around each square.  But the photo fabric is iron-on, so it was ok and actually was for the best because these bookmarks ended up being no-sew.  I found some light fusible web that I planned to use for another WIP.  I took the scraps from some fat quarters, that I used for my placemat project detailed below, and cut two rectangles about 3 inches wide and 7 inches long.  I cut the fusible web the same size and place between the two pieces of wrong-facing fabric.  I ironed the fabric together and arranged my photo fabric squares on the rectangle fabric and iron those on two.  I cleaned up the edges (ie cut about 1/4 inch off each side) and voila!  a no-sew photo fabric bookmark.

Things I would change about this project:  Considering I was using 3 in by 7 in fabric, I probably would have made the photo squares a bit bigger, maybe 1.75 or 2 inches.  Given more time, I would have taken the time to center each photo. And finally, I need to invest in a pair of pinking shears to make the edges less pedestrian.  Hopefully, I will do a tute and post some pictures at a later date.  I was rushing through what ended up being three projects that I neglected to take pictures and was too exhausted to take pictures of the finished products. :(

Thursday, I had a second idea to make placemats with family pictures for Tiger Daddy's maternal grandmother.  Seemed like a simple enough idea and it only took me about two hours from start to finish.  Because of the time constraint, I only used one picture per placement and sized them to about 5 in x 8 in.  I printed the pictures on the photo fabric as well.  I took 4 coordinating fat quarters (same pattern, different colors), cut them down to 17 inch x 13 inch.  I chose 17 inches because my iron-on vinyl comes 17 inches wide and I wanted to minimize wasting the vinyl.

I first ironed the picture the fabric, centering by eye, and then ironed on the vinyl.  I then sewed the vinylized fabric to some white broadcloth that I had in my stash (also cut to 17 x 13), right sides facing. Note: sewed just three sides around. Then I turned it right-side out and sewed the 4th end and top stitched around.  I ironed the back of the placemats again and also iron the front, using a fat quarter on top to avoid melting the vinyl.

Things I would change about this project:  I would make the pictures bigger and all the same dimensions or I would do a collage of pictures per placemat.  I would coordinate the backing with the color of the front fabric... Either use the same fabric for front and back, or a coordinating color. Basically, I would have planned this further in advance.  I might use a heavier weight fabric next time, either for the backing or the front or both.  The vinyl helps to stiffen the placemats, but they aren't as stiff as I would like.  Not that they have to be, just a personal preference.

The make-up bag:  My mother-in-law loved the fabric and even offered to put a couple in her antique booth.  I was 95% happy with the final product.  I accidentally left on side of the zipper showing on the inside and I forgot to add the handle this time.  I was going to attach it differently than last and completely spaced making the handle as I was rushing.  I liked the upholstery weight fabric and how it made the make-up bag more substantial.

Again and again, I never seem to learn that rushing is the root of all mistakes.  But everything turned out beautifully and was appreciated.

Happy Mother's Day to All!!!